All I Ask Of You – Poem

I don’t ask for much.

Give me some time, any moment you can spare.
Give me some attention, so I won’t have to share.
Just a kiss or two when you’re standing close.
Just the trail of your finger going down my nose.

I don’t ask for flowers – I don’t care for roses.
I don’t ask for love letters – I don’t need your proses.

I don’t ask for much.

I don’t need dinners at fancy restaurants.
Your arms wrapped around me is all I can want.
Your hands on my stomach as we go off to sleep.
Your laughter in my ear as we watch some TV.

I don’t ask for rings- jewelry is not my thing.
I don’t ask for money – I don’t cost a thing.

I don’t ask for much.

Just hold on real tight and don’t let me go.
Kiss my neck and nibble on my earlobe.
Hold my hand when we walk down the street.
Give me your lap whenever I need a seat.

I don’t ask for your name – I’ve got my own.
I don’t ask for any toys – I’m way too grown

I ask for your lips, so that I can have them to kiss.
I ask for your heart, so I know that I’m missed.
I ask for arms, so I can keep your embrace.
I ask for your eyes, and the contours of your face.
I ask for your skin, your voice and the wonder of it all.
I ask for you  during spring, winter, summer and fall.

Untitled Musings #4

She came over to my apartment, and I couldn’t help but feel a little anxious. We’d been dating for some weeks and I have to admit that I really like her. I’ve always liked her really. I’d known her for a while, but just never really had the nerve to ask her on a date. When I did, we hit things off so well that it only made sense to keep dating. When she kissed me, I knew that I didn’t want to stop kissing her. And the way she looked at me – some kind of twinkle in her eye, biting her bottom lips and a blush on her cheeks – just only reassured me that I was right to ask her out again. Continue reading

Untitled Musings #2

The water felt nice that day.

We journeyed to the farther end of the beach where other locals hung out, away from the tourists who populated the areas that caught the most sun and had the most access to everything they could buy with their hard earned foreign money.

We laid in the sand for what seemed like hours…the warm kernels exfoliating our skin, my legs thrown carelessly and lovingly across his, my eyes closed, soaking up the feeling of cool air faintly trailing over our bodies. Continue reading

Micro-Story – There Once Was: A Couple

There was a couple that occupied the two seater cornered of the train. The girl wore white Jordan sneakers while her counterpart wore black socks and open-toe adidas slippers – the footwear of champions. They laughed and smiled, holding hands and interlocking fingers. The girl slung her legs over the boy’s knees. They hugged and cuddled all the while laughing and exchanging looks of longing. The man that stood next to them tried to choke back laughter as he listened in on their conversation. They kissed, nuzzled, caressed fingers, kissed again, and again and when the girl yawned, the boy placed his hand to her mouth. They sat in their own universe as the train jerked back and forth. And when it was their stop, they kissed, held hands and walked out the train doors together.

Thoughts from a linear place – Poetry

This poem is a response to a piece I read called “Thought from a Spotfilled Mind.” My poem doesn’t do the original justice, but enjoy anyway. 

I was thinking of you today.

I know, it such a ‘girl thing’ to say, but it’s true.
To be honest I was thinking about you looking at me that way you do…all filled with your silently manly love.
I was thinking of you looking at me.
It’s pretty damn often that I do this.
I was thinking of a way to possibly keep you in that glance for forever and a lifetime. I love that look on your face.
I want you to remain in that space.
I’d have it no other way. I want you to stay. I want you to want me to stay.

I want to lay with you, play with you. I want you to suggest sex at the most inappropriate time just to make me agitated. I want you to roll your eyes and look away when I talk about gaining weight (that I probably didn’t gain in the first place). I want you to walk past me in your football tee during the season and ignore me during the game. Then when it’s over tell me you love me just the same. I want to lay in bed and push my booty up against you. Then I want to feel your morning wood on my ass and pretend to be disgusted. “You guys can’t ever get enough?!” I’d say. Then you’d reply “Don’t blame me, we’re just made that way.” I want to watch you while you sleep. I want to wrap my arms around you while I’m asleep. I want to cry on your chest on days I can’t take anything anymore. Then hog the covers on days you get me really sore. And on days you’re sick, listen to how loud you snore. My poor baby. I want you to comfort me. I want you to come for me. I want to watch you scratch your chest when you wake up. I want to hear you yawn when you’re ready to sleep. I want to burp like a guy and see your look of pride. I want to ask a question that’ll make you run and hide. I want to laugh with you. Even when the jokes aren’t that funny. I want to catch you looking at some kind of porn. Then hide the fact that I’m secretly turned on.I want to get mad at you when you look at another girl and put your arm around me to assure me I’m the only one. I want to yell at you when you don’t wash your dishes. I want to hold your hand when I shop for pads. I want to occasionally hint you that someday you’ll be a great dad. I want you to rub my stomach when I have cramps. I want you to get turned on watching me lick stamps. I want to collapse on top of you after great sex. I want to have sex when you get mad at me so you’ll forget. I want to get mad at you when I think you forgot a special day. Then I want to blush when you send me flowers for no reason. I want you to slap my ass when you pass me by in the kitchen. I want you to rub my exposed legs when we’re eating out with friends. I want to see you throw your hands up in the air when you know you’re losing the fight. I want to see you at night. Every night. For the rest of our lives. I want to watch you drive around in circles when you won’t admit you need directions. And then see the look of joy on your face when we get to our destination. I want to order beers for you. I want to say prayers for you. I want to keep you safe. I want you see you rush in the morning when you’re late. I want to smile for you. I want to smile because of you. I want to get in lingerie for you. I want to end my day with you. I want to mate with you. Create with you. Have babies for you and raise those babies with you. I want to look at your face, amazed at the miracle I couldn’t have done without you. I want to sing for you. Put a ring on you. I want to be everything for you. I want to be your best friend. I want to be your lover. I wan to be so good to you, you forget your mother. I want to be with you. In you. I want to be so wrapped up in love with you that you see me when you look at the letters on a page. I want you to close your eyes and see my face. I want to go there baby with you. I want you to be here with me too. Lord there’s so much more I can say, but I was thinking about this when I thought of you today…

Love Letter – Journal Entry

“I want to make him mine. For forever and a day or two. I want to be able to wake up in the mornings with my ruffled hair tucked away under his chin. I want to feel that heat generated on my right shoulder from the left hand that held it all night long. I want to be the one who rubs his legs with my thighs every morning. The one receiving kisses on the forehead when he’s about to say ‘Good Morning,’ and the one whispering soft ‘I Love You’s in his ear. I want him to love me. The way he loved all those girls before with that passion that burns so bright, it drives the inner darkness away.”

 “I want him to love me so much, that it hurts just a smidge to say goodbye; love me so much in the same way that I love him. From the lashes on his eyes, the stud in his ear, the shape of his lips, and the hairs on his chin. From the build of his chest, the look of his belly button and the length of his legs. I bet you were thinking I was going to say something else. But you see I love him past the usual physical things that people associate with love. And that’s how I want him to love me.”

“I want him to love me no matter what- Spring, Summer, Winter and Fall. Through it all. I want him to not only love me, but to be in love with me. So in love that when he writes the word, his name is in the middle of it. So in love with me, that no matter how I look, no matter how many of his babies I have, I will always remain eternally glowing. And I will be ever-flowing with love for him.”

-2007

w/love,

-alja

Something – Entry 7

I want you, the right way…

 My friends and I were looking for a table to sit at and saw a couple empty chairs at a table off to the corner. We were hungry and didn’t want to miss all the mumbo jumbo speeches about the benefits of higher education. Continue reading

Something – Entry 5

“You look like…a perfect fit…”

I came across his profile online one night, out of sheer boredom. He was a fellow high school alum who was incredibly smart and just as handsome. I think my new found brazen attitude towards meeting people online was getting the best of me. That or I was just trying to battle my loneliness. Either way, I sent him a message and he responded and we corresponded back and forth.

“Excuse me, missy! Now all of a sudden you’re chasing guys?” said one of my girlfriends. Continue reading

Something – Entry 4

“something heavenly led me to you…”

It was actually the internet.  I was bored and wanted to make new friends, however, my not-so-apparent self-loathing kept me from just walking up to people, or stalking cute guys like the girls I hung out with. So, I rummaged through social networking sites and found him. We had gone to the same high school and his face looked vaguely familiar. I figured, “why not?” and messaged him.

And he messaged me back. Continue reading

Speak Easy Words – Excerpt

An excerpt from a story I wrote years ago. Please tell me what you think!

Speak Easy Words

The night was cold, but pretty young. Jasper decided to take his friend Arnold to a spot where he knew the guys could have a good time and keep warm. The name of the joint was ‘Delicious’ and it was in the market of selling the best moonshine you ever tasted. So good, it was guaranteed to put hairs on your chest and chin. They were also in the market of selling time with some of the most beautiful women you could ever lay your eyes on. This was Arnold’s first time there, but it wouldn’t be his last. As the two gentlemen entered the speak-easy, the smell of tobacco and perfume consumed them.

“This place is the cat’s meow!” said Arnold.
“Well buddy, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!” replied Jasper.

As they went to sit down, a very short woman with a rather grand presence about her, glided across the floor. Arnold was immediately hypnotized. She noticed him too. She walked over and announced herself.

“Hey shug, the name’s Apple. What’s yours?

The southern bell of her voice rang and sent Arnold into a trance he could barely get out of.

“My name’s Arnold…”

“Well,” she started “seeing as I’ve never seen you here before let me be the first to welcome you to ‘Delicious.’”

“Thank you,” said Arnold. He gave a slight nod and Apple shot him a smile and wink. She turned her back to young man and swayed over to the dance floor. Arnold saw the back of her red gown—her back was bare and the rest of the red sequined gown hugged her hips, and round backside. He wanted to caress the smooth piece of pecan brown flesh that enticed his eye. He wanted to taste her, just like the fruit she was named after. And like the fruit, she seemed to be forbidden.

“Hey Miss Apple,” Arnold shouted. He got to his feet and walked across the floor to the vision in red, whose hair was pinned in an intricate maze of curls, and lips were colored in a matted deep red hue. “May I have this dance?”

“Well hun,” Apple smiled, “there are seven more in front of you, so if you don’t mind, I can dance with you after.”

“Sure,” replied Arnold. “I’ll wait in line so long as I get the chance to dance with you.”

As she walked away, his eyes followed close behind. Arnold had fallen in love with a beautiful creature, but didn’t know that returning those feelings was a service Apple couldn’t provide. In the business of prostitution, there was no time for love.